Me and my fiance’ had a girls day out…(I am still yet able to go en femme) but she told me she wanted a day were Kaylee and her could have some fun and catching up.  I could not ask for a better person in my life right now.  So our day went like this… she new of a shop called Sally’s deals so we went there and found a few cute things for her.  Then we went to Thunder CanyonBrewery and had lunch.  The service sucked but the food was great.  And as a Top Chef in the making, with a seasoned pallet, I can say it was pretty good.  The BBQ sauce needs alot of help but the mesquit(SP?) (local smoking wood of AZ) smoked brisket was good.  We then went to Ross.  Ross is my favorite store because they have a large selection for large women..or men LOL.  Jamie makes jokes that the plus size area we have to go to is full of curtains, but we always find really cute stuff there.

I am very bummed I cannot go en femme right know or even take en femme picture.  I just do not have the shape of even a homely woman, however, I have been very proactive in researching my lifestyle and more and more have been learning this is not a crossdressing fetish but a bonafide gender miss cue that I have.

So after a lot of fun and pressing from Jamie, here are the pictures I allowed to be published LOL/ J/K.  Constructive crtitiques and helpful advice are very much welcomed.

 

Lately I have been struggling with my feelings.  Many days I feel like I am distancing myself from my masculine side and then bam I am back to being that father and husband and I start to feel very confused.  Now to add to the problems there are all these new terms, transexual, transgender, crossdresser…and nothing to explain who I am.  I sometimes feel like I have to have this label, like I am on a trasitioning assembly line and some lady is stamping girls foreheads depending on where they are at.  I am also having problems because I don’t have enough “real” support.  Jamie is awesome but I would like to have more people to talk to…more points of view.  I like online forums but they only go so far.  My family and friends really don’t need to know anything right now because they would not understand.  I think I need to understand myself before they can.  I sometimes just want to scream.  I feel like I am stuck hiding myself, just like I had to do when I was in the Navy. 

So I am trying to become more independent, but it so very hard with not having many transgender friends.  I have learned a lot from online forums.  In these forums I have also met many amazing girls and their support GGs.  The only real problem is that online relationships can only go so far.  If it wasn’t for Jamie I would have gone bonkers years ago.  I am getting better with make-up so score 1pt in my “Independent Pool”.  I can get dressed up all on my own (don’t laugh but at first it was hard) so add another point.  I am getting more courageous with shopping, however, I still will not go out in public en femme.  I have become much better at releasing my feminine feelings (add another point).  So all in all my becoming an independent girl seems to be going ok.  I just somtimes feel like a little baby or a handicapped person who wants to do it all right now.  Let me tell ya girls, becoming a lady is a hard road LOL.

Love always,

Kaylee Cassidy

 

She is a girl who only few know.  That girl we see through the window.  Shy and quiet, she hates to stare.  Sweet and sassy and always debonair. 

Many don’t understand her different thought.  Many don’t know of the battles she’s fought.  Her feelings crack they’re not made of steel.  She has numerous layers for you to peel. 

She’ll be girlfriend, she’ll be your mate.  But say you love her don’t hesitate.  Because when she’s scared she runs away.  To her crying spot where she’ll lay.

She’ll mourne each and every day.  Few will know the price she’ll pay.  She’ll go inside her body never to return.  Until someone reignites her heart, restarts the burn.

She is a girl who only few know.  She is a girl going against the flow.  She is a girl not like you, not like me.  She is the girl known as Kaylee.

Copyright 2007 B. Wolf

 

Yes now I know what you other Genetic Girls (GGs) have to go through.  I’m finally able to shave my body and keep it that way.  I had a plan to use our hair trimmer to knock down the forest of hair that grows on my body, but after our move, the razor is lost forever.  So after 2 days of running out of hot water and a lot of help from Jamie I got most of my lower body done.  I still have a few small hairs hear and there which I will take care of tomarrow and a few spots on my ass need tending as well.

I feel so much more girly getting all that hair off me.  The hair made me feel dirty all the time when I got hot and sweat.  I will be getting my upper body done soon and plan on alternating upper body and lower body every 2 days.  I need to keep myself smooth because I never know when an urge to play dress up will come over me hehe!

The shoes I have pictured are my first pair.  They are a tad big, but it was really hard for Jamie to convert my size.  I think she did an awesome job at picking them out.  Every girl needs a pair of black shoes to go with that little black dress LOL.

I had an awesome day with jamie today.  I have a cute pair of purple boyshort panties that when worn over my silver gaff look like 1 cute pair.  I wore them all day and felt so very sexy.  We got some new nail polish and window shopped at Ross.  Ross is great because they have so many deals.

TaTa,

Kaylee Cassidy

 

 

 

 

 

Most people would probably think transgendered people are weird.  We are just like anyone else…we have things we love.  I love being a girl.  Girlfriends are much better to talk to than guy friends are.  They will sit and talk as well as listen.  I love to sit and chat with my lover Jamie.  We can have so much fun just relaxing over a wine cooler and chat about clothes, boys, makeup, and whatever else we decide.

I love the way women’s clothes feel on me.  They make me feel sexy and I love the colors.  It is so much fun shopping for clothes and SHOES lol!  I have (with the help of Jamie) quite a few clothes and a pair of shoes that are made so men can wear them.  I have D sized breastforms that make me feel more like a woman.  The only hard thing with playing dress up is tucking Mr. Willy.  I have, above average, large testicals and it makes it very hard to get the flat look I want.  I have devised some very weird but good ways to get around this, however, if the boys were not there I would have a much easier time.

I am learning to be a girl day by day.  I have just dove into the deep end with make-up and feel, with practice, I could be very good at applying it to myself and my girlfriends.

More to come on this one,

Love Kaylee

Hi folks!!!  This blog was created by me, Kaylee, to let loose and be a girl without any jerks giving me crap.  I will primarily be using this blog to get out my frustrations, talk about my dreams, the transgender lifestyle, and just being a girl.  I will also be letting my friends and family chat with me about topics I post here.  I understand that the internet is not real private, but these are my thoughts so please be kind and respect them…If you don’t like what I am about then you can just leave.

Love Always,

Kaylee Cassidy